SATURDAY, n. Day in which the first half is devoted to making plans; the second wriggling out of them.
FUR, n. The substance worn by our most agreeable friends.
THANKFULNESS, n. Emotion we experience most profoundly when everyone else is out Black Friday shopping and the house is finally quiet.
SNOW, n. A cosmic sign for “Maybe you should stay in this weekend after all.”
SAINT, n. Friend who understands that “quiet” is not the same as “dull.”
REASONABLE, adj. The notion that a cat makes an above-average dinner companion.
QUIET, adj. A vague, relative term used to describe introverts; ironically, one we almost never choose to describe ourselves.
PAPER, n. Handy shield on train, bus, or airplane; occasionally readable.
OVERSTIMULATED, adj. Mental state of toddlers and introverts around 5 p.m.
NAP, v. Euphemism for “close my eyes and pretend to be asleep so no one talks to me.”